why? Oh why?
Here I am. Sitting here with a smile on my face, my a monster screaming to get out in my head. I paused my life on Facebook and Instagram, but, how much good will that do? I'm 47 and facing the possibility of death. Why? At least I beat my mom's age before she passed. I still think of those from my past, those I have relationships with. Alice, Shannon, Yolanda, Tricia, Jennifer, Leah.. these are the mains. Wish I could relive them days. But I gotta come to the reality that I cannot, nor ever, can go back to them days. My head is all jumbled up. I can't tell Mandi everything, as I am afraid it'd kill her. And I love her too much...